Heading out for a few days hike in the UK is a pretty tame affair. Of course, you have to make sure the weather won’t be too treacherous and that you have something like a Mckenzie jacket in case conditions change, but at least we don’t have to worry about wild animals. Years ago, when I hiked in Canada, you had to go and register with the Parks Canada rangers before you headed out on anything longer than a few hours. This wasn’t so they could keep tabs on you big brother style, but was a precaution. If you (for some awful reason) failed to deregister on your return, they would send out a search party for you. There was a whole host of animals waiting out there to try and cut your hike short.

Everyone who entered the various parks in the Rockies were given leaflets on what to do if a black bear attacks (play dead) or if a grizzly bear attacks (punch him on the nose – how?!). I understand the information has changed slightly since then, but throughout the Rockies, the mantra was to try not to surprise a bear. They said that we should talk or sing loudly whilst walking so that bears had good notice of your impending arrival and had plenty of time to scarper. I think we managed to sing the entire back catalogue of the 80’s when we were hiking. Not that there was any need. I’m sure the bears would have heard the rustling of our Mckenzie jackets for miles off.

While it is rare to come across a bear, elks on the other hand, can be seen pretty much everywhere. They look like pretty deer grazing on the side of the road, but catch an elk in rutting season, or a female protecting her young and they can slice your belly open from throat to navel. A Parks Canada ranger told us this information with relish. Maybe we should ditch those Mckenzie jackets. Scare stories abound. We had a three hour ride with a guy who picked us up and filled us with as many animal horror stories as he could. Thank God it was at the end of our trip in the Rockies and not at the beginning or we would never have stepped out of our tent – or slept in one for that matter. So the next time you go hiking in the UK, don’t scream when you see an adder – things could be a lot worse. Oh, and here it’s perfectly fine to wear your Mckenzie jacket without fear of attack!